A memo to Museveni: Ghosts is your crowd

The Electoral Commission has finalized the Presidential and Parliamentary Elections of 14th January 2021. That was all prepared for victory for the incumbent since 1986. The President had all the stars aligned, the moon was shining and the predetermined results was ready for the books.

President Museveni was doing what he needed to secure yet another term in office. His unofficial eight term after the 6th Election. Yoweri is ready for action again and is spreading the message of priorities for this term. He could just have used a spreadsheet from what he promised in the early 1990s and it would have been much of the same.

In this time we all know the drill. The President will have soon an inauguration. Invite a few dignitaries and have a bash of glory at Kololo. That is just what he does. However, the numbers and the election is leaving little to be sought after.

The President got more goats, ghosts and dead voting for him than real people. The Polling Stations had more pre-ticked and stuffed ballot boxes. It wasn’t like a real election. There was ferrying of voters. Soldiers voting several of times and so many other tricks of the trade. Some polling stations had bigger number of voters, than the amount of voters in their voters rolls. That is all deliberate acts.

That is why we know the dead and the ghosts are pre-ticking ballots. The ones dying and sick who couldn’t come. Still did vote. It just wasn’t their will, but the authorities decision to make. The state had prefixed the results and jam packed with unknown character voting in drones for the President. That is how things goes.

If the President was so sure he wanted the will of the people and believed in democracy. Why does he only trust the dead, the ghosts and the goats? What about the people breathing? Do you fear the people who has a heartbeat and a pulse? Are you worried about the conscience of the people with a mind of their own?

I just wonder if this President who knows it all. Really despise the people so much. That he doesn’t have the integrity of their vote and ticking of the ballots. That he rather be representing the ghosts, goats and the dead. That is really sad. A man who fought a liberation war only to reign over the dead.

The biggest irony of that, considering his advance age. That he will soon be meeting them in his afterlife too. There the gathering of his biggest constituency. The dead and the ghosts will celebrate as they are meeting their leader in the spirit. That will a big day for the old man. A day he should look forward too.

Right now his representing a rare crowd. The President is a pre-ticked representative and the real ghost whisperer. He is the man who knows what the dead wants to vote for and secure their future. The old man must be proud of himself. That he has achieved this and become the man for the undead and spirits flowing across the fields.

Museveni, the man for eternity and beyond. Peace.

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